Get the measure kids. Welcome to the compost heap guide to what's hot and what's not. Because I have no graphic skills, you will have to imagine a picture of a tape measure or thermometer going up the right hand side of the screen. Sorry.
You might worry to find something you think is HOT in the NOT column. First; for shame, you unfashionable goose. But hang in there, it will arbitrarily switch to the HOT column in a couple of weeks.
You might worry to find something you think is HOT in the NOT column. First; for shame, you unfashionable goose. But hang in there, it will arbitrarily switch to the HOT column in a couple of weeks.
Getting it right: when treading that fine line between sophisticated and silly headgear, remember colour blocking is KEY this season
MP3: Korallreven-Sa Sa Samoa (Elite Gymnastics Mix) [ft. Julianna Barwick]
This hits so many sweet spots that it is borderline obscene. The cover image, a close up of a big bunch of pills, would already pretty much sum up this Swedish indie dance track before Elite Gymnastics got their paws on it (BUT OF COURSE it's Swedish. Up there, they wet their fingers with break-up tears before dipping them in MDMA). What the American duo bring to the party is the most shameless throwback hardcore breakbeat you will hear this side of Zomby's Where Were You in '92.
Also contains: Whitney Houston, the soon-to-feature-in-one-of-my-lists Julianna Barwick, and disembodied voices breathing words like 'Ecstasy' and 'Hacienda'. Somewhere, Simon Reynolds is ejaculating.
Stream: Mohn-Eberplatz 2020
Kompakt old-timers Burger and Voigt are best friends, and do lots of best friends stuff together like eating vegetarian food and making ambient techno (apparently, the lads who founded Kompakt in a Cologne record store all love their veggie grub). This new collaboration comes on like a brooding emotional crisis in a vaguely futuristic darkness (or maybe that's just the title bleeding into my impressions).
Dark Souls
After it received much twitter repping (aka rabid evangelizing) from my friend Aidan, I caved in and bought this game. He will join me on a podcast soon to talk about it. You die a lot in the game, which is central to most discussion around it. Of course, in my day, one repeatedly bit the bullet in many games. Precision platformers and side scrolling shooters appear to have hardened my gaming hide more than I realized, so I've found myself comfortable enough with dying every five minutes. Will I become a rabid evangelist? Will I start to resent games pitched to a wider audience? Will I end up loathing Skyrim? Oh Skyrim, I jest, I love you. Not for your clumsy battle system, but for your hard beautiful landscape, for the wild cragged lands of The Reach under your two moons, for your underground ocean of mist with its bio-luminescent fungal stars, and for providing my Orcen betrothed (yeah, I married an Orc, what of it?).
World Poetry Day
Why not read a good poem?
NOT
Parvo
Remember I got sick? It turns out I caught a weird virus called Parvo. Parvo is also known as slapped-cheek because it makes your cheeks blotchy.
Steak on a stone
What the fuck is this shit? "Try our exciting, sizzling, steak on a stone experience" bawled a sign outside the hotel in Kells. Curious, I researched this new thing. It appears that you cook your own steak on a slab brought to your table. Let me run that by you again, you go to a place where you normally pay someone else to cook your food for you to experience the "exciting" novelty of cooking your own food. Paying. To. Cook. Your. Own. Food. Of course, there'll be plenty of gawms who'll think this is the best thing ever. The sort of saps whose eyes bug out on stalks when a shitty piece of factory farmed chicken coated in knorr is brought sizzling to their table in a mid price Mexican restaurant in a business park. Five weeks later they'll still be going on about the amazing meal they had in The Aubergine (stock name for an Irish county town restaurant), "it was something else. It came out sizzling. SIZZLING mind you". Here's a thought. Food sizzles on contact with heat. It is very hard to cook food on a hot surface without it sizzling at some point in the process. If you put a poop on hot stone, the poop will sizzle too. There is nothing remarkable about a fucking sizzle.
10 comments:
G: Oh my Ghod, this is fookin' HILARIOUS! You were in fine form on this one, sir. You were really SIZZLIN'! (sorry.) You must be feeling better... & I thot only dogs & cats could get parvo. Please advise...?
My problem with Steak on a Stone is the typeface used on the sign outside the hotel...and also the fact that whilst on the bus to Dublin I passed a side-of-the-road-advert-lorry with the same photo...I just want to feel unique and special in my steak purchasing, and I do not.
Wow, have you turned into a dog are what? Parvo is a canine virus indeed. What have you been doing lately? Oh well as long as you don't start barking the Asleep on the compost heap, I guess your alright then.
Oh by the way so happy you have a new microphone!!! Yea!!!
@Tad and @anonymous - humans get it too! http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmedhealth/PMH0001972/
@sarah_mixtapes I think it is a sort of a franchisey gimmicky thing where steak on a stone packs are sent out to restaurants. There is a company that does it.
@anonymous - new podcast will be up on Saturday so you can judge the microphone then
Just kidding about the wise crack regarding you being a dog, please don't be to sensitive! I hope your feeling better really!! I like to joke around.
Well the microphone you have now goes in and out not to clear and I missed bits of the discussion. Good luck with your new one!
yeah, the new one is a great improvement.
sensitive? don't worry about that.
YES...so with you on the steak-on-a-stone bit. I went through the same snit when "mongolian bbq" was a big thing. (Pick out all the ingredients and we'll fry it! Well I could do that at home, right? I pay the chef to pick brilliant meat/vegetable combos FOR me, because I'm a food dolt!) See also cook-your-own shabu-shabu.
You are a man after my own heart. Yah there is one of those Mongolian BBQ places in Dublin too. It was trendy to go there a few years back.
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