In short, I'm 31 years old and have realized that my life has fallen into patterns of habit and repetition that are drawing some of the vibrancy out of it. This coming summer I have two months off work, July and August (I currently work in a special school for children with autism) and I am going to use those months as constructively as possible to rediscover some of the magic in life and, more to the point of what I am doing on this blog, to let my writing reflect this rediscovery. I am also going to do a lot more personal writing, (a 'shitload' to use one of my favourite crude terms), but it might not be as music based as before. I've drawn back on music writing responsibilities elsewhere too.
So maybe expect a bit more personal stuff. Of course, funnies (when it comes to my style I realised a long time ago that I find it hard to write in a sustained serious tone and perhaps never will), and (who knows?) stuff that will veer a little further into fiction.
There will also be some small material about depression and alcohol addiction (both of which I've had a bit of a past with). I am keen to write about these things in a sideways fashion that steps outside misery lit cliché. If I cannot manage that, then I will continue to shy away from these topics which, in my experience of reading about them elsewhere, have sometimes made me want to tear my hair out at the tropes and psychobabble people fall back on. Although, a friend of mine recently sent me something she is writing along those lines that bucked these pitfalls beautifully.
In saying all of this, there will be music. There will always be music. There are albums I want to write about, but I guess for me to keep my writing fresh, as much for me as for any reader, I want to start exploring other avenues a little more. I have a sneaking feeling that not everybody who comes here comes for the music any more, as some of the posts of mine that have generated the most kind and varied comments are those that do not address music directly. I'm going to pull a sly stroke though. Watch me pull it right now and let you in on a secret. Whenever I add an MP3 to the end of a post it means the majority of the traffic for that post comes through the hype machine. Sweet, hah?
your author and a beautiful little nephew who is one year old today.
MP3: Sam Cooke-A Change is Gonna Come
8 comments:
Look forward to it. I would happily read about you going to the shop to buy some crisps, but the music just makes it even better.
what was the phd so,a comedy strip? i'll look forward to this i write about depression myself,eating what i can find in the bed-thinking nobody likes me,the softness of the bed,back ache-did you ever read dostoevsky?
get a load of this
http://www.online-literature.com/dostoevsky/notes_underground/1/
honreal,where was that all my life?
what i find is you never end writing anything it just all ends up in the phone,depression,it is surprising what would cheer you up,another man's misery is often the ticket-sam cooke as well,on the ball.
one of the worst things about depression is it turns you into a bollocks when you are out-nothing like a shower after two weeks of bachelor frog though.anyway
i mean i could annoy you posting this,you could say i don't need this guy on my blog writing rubbish.the best way to cheer yourself up as g.k. chesterton used say is cheer someone else up.i dunno?
writing for the sake of it can end badly as well,who knows-be nice to do that shit here.
anyway keep reading till dostoevsky gets to the bit about literally "throwing slaps"
anyway write plenty i look forward to reading it :-l
@Lucewoman - thanks, as ever. Well, the first thing I've to do is get through those nine albums, so music is coming in a thick and fast glut for the time being. Funnily near the start of this blog I used to write a LOT of personal stuff and the MP3 and little recommendation got a little paragraph near the end. So there might be more of those, less of full exhaustive posts around albums.
@boylieber - great tag! As for the PhD, I really don't know what I am going to do with it yet, as I am wary of wandering straight back into academics when I have more pressing personal things to rebalance first. It'll always be there for me though.
Your comment cheered me up. There is nothing better than a good honest comment. And you know I've never read notes from the underground so I am going to give that a go, thank you.
I know what you mean about being a bollocks when you are out. I can be aloof, or manic depending on my humour.
Thanks again, and hope your own life has its happies. Sure nothing will ever be a bed of roses, will it?
"when it comes to my style I realised a long time ago that I find it hard to write in a sustained serious tone and perhaps never will"-you! a doc.but i know,functional writing i hate it-one of my college lecturers failed me this summer-i am taking the shagger to court tho see how he likes that-trying to ruin me!
a bed of roses then,no i suppose it won't.i phrase i never liked mind you i always envisioned a harrison ford type individual laying his bird down on a bed with petals on it-the vibe was "what am i looking at this for?".there's ford trying to add a bit of spice and here's me somehow in the room-bassinger or one of these women,the other on pheiffer.ah writing even if it's drivel is a great comfort i find.
wrt dostoyevsky i only read the start of it,and i was happy enough-i am reading triggs now about roy keane's dog, do you think there might be a subtext? as the woman in peep show said one time-keano is a legend i don't care what anyone says.had to give up the drink myself,i miss it-the throwing slaps bit is only about ten pages in,other than that i don't know tbh.
people can cheer you up alright-ah you know yourself,i find invariably you let them down and you end up feeling almost worse,i mean no matter how good things are you can convince yourself otherwise,it is a bags of a situation,people will make you angry or whatever.
for the last month i have convinced myself that if i wrote the persons name after writing the text they would hate me and prob not respond-that their had to be a lightness of touch,same with twitter-
do you know thisismyjam-ill copy the name of the song and type it into youtube-out of spite!
if you could use your blog to write out of depression it would cheer me up i would use it for the same reason
worst paragraph - > ok so i've no more in the tank-normally i write stuff and then don't send it,go to bed at half six that kind of thing.anyway i' like this anonymity i have no fear of speaking or being embarrassed this way no matter how bad what you come out with is it's not a book.hope you keep thios up,or thuas would be better-g'luck.a fairly weak paragraph-nort depressed now just annoyed
people appear to be going to a thing called tio the seasessions-let them the luders-paul valery said taste is a thousand distates
when i was in saint pats-for drink-i am a mathematician now-i saw plenty people-paddy kavanagh said the best cure for ennui was a fistfull of fivers-he had a point there i think-nothing like a wad of cold hard fucking money i say.no exclamation mark there.unless it's ..!..
anyway killer bebo as the say l8r bye bye,bye.bye bye bye bye.night john night fucking edward =:-)
but yeah like i say write plenty
Boylieber, I think I know who you are and if I do - again personal thanks a lot for this stuff, if I don't, then same thanks, sure, what odds how people know each other.
Ah yeah, the point about the PhD is that I have never ever made a connection between scientific writing and its style and any other sort of writing I've done. I've kept them separate, like as if one was writing and the other was (I dunno) just a different thing altogether. Now how illogical is that?
I'd disagree on the 'cold hard cash' thing though, all I want in life is a bit of mental peace and ability to smell the flowers without always questioning myself in the head.
Sorry to hear about the craic with the lecturer and court. If you are who I think you are please DM me or email me to let you know how you are getting on. Anyway, I'll keep this up, and like you said, I know its not a book, but when you blog for a long time you sometimes start to wonder about an audience and feel obligated even though, pragmatically, you shouldn't I guess, what with not being paid etc.
It's no vocation. It is a lovely hobby to have though. Has kept me saner than I would be if I didn't have this little place to write from time time to time.
Good luck :)
G: Bring on the personal stuff & the fiction. Looking forward 2 it. & there'll always B music -- after you finish the rest of yer Top 9 1/2way thru July...?
Take all the time you need. I'm taking a bit of a vacation right now myself. But I can't stop doing this....
Everyone gets stuck in a rut at times I can truly relate, the new idea about your blog writing will be a nice thing! It's time to get out experience and enjoy your life! Try not being so serious, your beautiful nephew should bring some of the fun side flying out from you! Little children have a way of doing this!!
I love that song at the end!! My kind of music at times. Take care now, time for your fun side now!!
thanks both for those lovely positive comments.
Ah yeah, I am going to spend my two months out and about, seeing people, painting, writing, and figuring out other stuff about my career in psychology etc.
It's a good window of time, but @anonymous is right, I need to make it fun.
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